


A Brittle Diamond

by Drippin_Joe



Series: Crystal Pink AU [2]
Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: Angst and Feels, Collection of the Gs bein real ones, Mental Breakdown, Other, Pink Diamond Lives, Post-Gem War, Prequel I guess?, Pretty much the same level as self harm, Reminiscing, Rose Quartz is Not Pink Diamond, Self-poofing, but also Pre-Gem war stuff, characters and tags to be added, everything will grow with time, how do I tag this?, revolves around Pink but will sometimes be outside her perspective
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-25
Updated: 2021-02-14
Packaged: 2021-03-18 04:54:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,717
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28986681
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Drippin_Joe/pseuds/Drippin_Joe
Summary: The life of a previous tyrant isn't an easy one to overcome, especially when thousands of years of it was spent isolated and alone. For the past six thousand years of it, you've lived on Earth with gems you think you can truly call friends, even if old memories you repress bubble to the surface.You can't get rid of the burning light forever scarred into your head, always there when you close your eyes.
Relationships: Pink Diamond & Greg Universe
Series: Crystal Pink AU [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2126298
Comments: 4
Kudos: 15





	1. Reminiscing

**Author's Note:**

> Hey, welcome!
> 
> This is just gonna be a little fic where I write stuff that happens before the main work, Just Like You: Crystal Pink AU. If you haven't read that, then I guess you'll be getting a little preview of some of it. Most, if not all, the events in here will be before the start of Just Like You. I guess it's not really spoiler-y in that sense, but maybe. 
> 
> Most of them will be contained in their own chapter, and two won't be continuations unless I choose to. That might change as I go on and make more. This won't be my top priority so updates could be slow until I want to write more of it. This is for me to try and get to writing if I'm stuck, in a way.

“You need me to watch him?” 

The words sat in her throat like a hammer. It didn’t help that he practically dumped the small child in her arms. 

“Just for a little bit, I need to run out and get groceries for Vidalia. It’s a part of our deal.” Greg said with exasperation lacing the edge of his voice. Pink Diamond glanced over to the right with unease, the bags under her eyes growing heavy. Greg sighed and shook his head, “Please, I need you to do this.” 

“Greg, I’m not sure about this. I don’t know much about human offspring. What if something wrong happens?” 

“It’ll be easy, all you need to do is make sure nothing bad happens to him, and feed him if he gets hungry. I won’t be gone long enough for that to happen, but if you need to, just get his bottle, boil some water, and pour the formula powder into it. Just shake it real good and it should be alright. Um… make sure he’s warm, okay? I’ll see you later!”

The diamond found herself alone after Greg took his keys from a nearby rack and left. After it closed, she stared at the hall with a mortified frown. Then the door swung open and Greg poked his head out from the hallway quickly. 

“And don’t steal him either! I don’t want that to happen again, please!” His head disappeared and the sound of the door closing again made her shapeshifted stomach churn with anxiety.

All she was left with was her thoughts, the last place she wanted to be with. The unexpected absence of Greg made her eyes wander around to anything to ease her worries.

She was left alone with… _Steven_ . This was the first time it was just her and the infant. Rose’s _son_. 

A soft but firm squirming in her arms reminded her of the baby she was holding. He was wrapped in a baby blue blanket, acting like a cocoon of comfort for him. His face contorted into an uncomfortable frown as he squirmed, unaware of the gem internally freaking out. 

He was so small in her arms, much smaller than Amethyst ever was. He wasn’t smaller than any of the Pebbles, but he was much more fragile than them. 

Rose gave her a long and... honestly horrifying explanation about infants and babies right after she announced her pregnancy. Most of it… the complicated bits, she already forgot about. But some stuck with her, like how easily they can get hurt and how they grow with time and learn. 

Steven’s squirming in her arms lessened, and he made a short, high pitched yawn before resting again. Pink’s eyes were glued to him, wide and melting in awe at the action. 

Her thoughts died down as she repositioned herself on the couch, leaning more against the cushions and falling back until her afro pushed up on the wall. Head angled up at the ceiling now, she stared at the unchanging white with a deadpan. 

How had she gotten here? By walking, obviously, but she ignored that part of herself to dig deeper into the often ignored subject. Reminiscing was horrible, which was something she would stand by until her gem shattered. Why would you go after horrible memories of the past you hate? 

She breathed in. But not _all_ the memories were bad… it nearly made her cringe. _Most_ were bad, and the others tainted. Like a void in her pink hue, always swirling to take a piece of her yet again like the other countless times. 

But… the light was always there too. The Crystal Gems… Garnet, Pearl, Amethyst, the Quartz Battalion, Bismuth, Biggs… Rose. Earth and its beauty, the animals that live there, the humans that find ways to live and entertain themselves. 

Always burning like a campfire in the night. And like all campfires… it goes out.

_By a bright light permanently scorched into her mind._

A piercing cold on her neck made her reach a hand up and acknowledge the tears running down her cheeks, face, and the sides of her head. She lifted up her head and let out a shaky breath, hollowing out her closed throat. 

The tears were still streaming down, landing against her form. A flash of Greg walking in made her quickly wipe it away and get rid of her choking neck. She opted to stay straight up, concentrating her eyes to the table sitting in the middle of the room. 

If Steven wasn’t in her arms, she would facepalm right now. She was so, so… idiotic. Always doing this to herself. 

She hated reminiscing. 

The front door opened up, and Pink saw Greg rush past with his arms full of bags. Her brow raised up when he disappeared into the kitchen. A part of her wondered how much humans _really_ needed to warrant so much food. Although Vidala... Vidalia(?) as she heard from Greg, was having a hard time raising her own child. 

Greg walked out with an exhausted sigh before continuing, soon bringing another group of bags to the kitchen. Pink assumed he was done when he sat down on the couch and placed his hands on his knees. 

“Woof, I tell ya’, that does not get easier after the third time.” He wiped sweat off his forehead before looking at Steven cradled against Pink, peacefully sleeping in his blanket. A smile spread on his lips. “Wow, you got him to sleep.” 

She nodded sheepishly, “Y-yep… I thought humans naturally slept. Is it different for babies?”

Greg chuckled at her question, that charm he always had tickling his voice. “For him apparently. I’ve… never had a kid before, so I couldn’t tell ya’. But Schtu-ball here always does something new.”

Pink smiled at the nickname, letting out a chuckle, “Schtu-ball? Hehe… why did you call him that?”

“Oh… it was this weird t.v. show that used to play all the time. Steven used to watch it and get excited whenever the main character appeared, so I just started calling him that.”

Pink grinned down at Steven warmly, “It’s adorable… I like it.” She gently placed a hand near his face, her grin brightening ever so slightly.

Silence fell over them as Greg looked down at the table in front of him and saw the photo of Vidalia and her husband, posed with their son. 

His eyes fell. A complete, content family… something he would never have. 

But… his eyes wandered over to Steven again, latching onto the boy. 

_Maybe he will._


	2. Nightmare

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pink has a nightmare, and Rose listens to her troubled vision.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: OOC-ish

“I tried sleeping again.” 

The short and nervous comment took Rose by surprise, but she hid it in a veil of support and interest. “Oh, really... How was it?”

Pink’s eyes held a weight to them, something Rose didn’t notice until about… today. A glance down and she noticed the diamond’s hands were so tightly curled into fists that her gloves were stretching into her hand. She looked off to the side, her bangs hanging over her eyes.

“I  _ hated _ it.” 

“And why’s that?” Rose slowly moved in and placed a hand on the diamond’s shoulder. “Would you like to tell me?” Her eyes grew softer as Pink bit her bottom lip and nodded, sniffing. Rose gently led her to a large but sturdy fallen log nearby. The forest they were in had a nice amount of clearings, perfect for viewing the sunset or getting a good sight of the surroundings. 

She laid a hand on Pink’s back and asked, “Why did you hate it? I thought it was fun.” 

“I thought it was too… but… you never told me dreams could be like…  _ that _ .” Pink placed a hand over her eyes and stuck a hand forwards, her fingers slowly falling into a dead position. 

“That?”

“You know… that…  _ horrifying _ . You said they were just visions made by your gem but… that was more!” Her voice rose into a pitiful shout, her voice on edge. She glanced at Rose before she quickly gained a regretful frown and an anxious face. “I-I’m sorry, I shouldn't have yelled! I-this isn’t… I’m wasting your time, I’m sorry-”

“No, no! I’m glad you’re telling me this! Please, if it’s bothering you, it’s okay to tell me.” Rose put a hand up in a calming gesture as Pink looked at her warily. Then she slowly changed her posture into a more subdued one, forcing herself to stay still. Everything in her cried not to, but the pressure was too much. 

“O-Okay… I… it wasn’t real. So you don’t need to worry.” 

“Okay, tell me what it was.”

Pink gave her a longing look before gulping gods knows what and looking down at the squished grass under her pink shoes. “The… dream started normal… I think. I was with you and Garnet, and Pearl… Amethyst wasn’t there. We were laughing, and gems were around us, laughing along too. Then… everyone was gone.” 

Her hands fell down, hanging between her legs as she leaned forward. Even while leaning, she was leagues taller than Rose. “I was alone, in a dark room… and I remembered it. There was only one place for light… it was too bright to look at. Then…” She went silent, her eyes focused on the ground. Rose sat still for her to continue, giving a confused glance once the silence stretched on for a time. 

As she was about to ask something, Pink interrupted her. “I saw  _ them _ .” 

Then her mouth clamped shut, the question already forgotten by Pink’s new words. ‘ _ Them? Wh-oh… no. _ ’ 

“They were there, Rose.” Her form shook slowly, rising ever so slightly as she carried on. “They… grabbed me, and took me to another room. Everything was black, I couldn’t move anything. My gem was  _ burning _ . A… how-” 

Pink stopped again and looked off in thought, a pink bead of sweat rolling off her cheek. Rose could tell she was struggling by the look in her eyes. She looked ready to give up. But she didn’t, unknowingly making Rose swell up in gratitude. 

“I… was hit by something. It burned… no, it  _ destroyed  _ me. My f-form felt like it was… going to explode! An-And I couldn’t even stop it! They were scowling at me, telling me I should be able to take it but I  **_CAN’T_ ** !” 

Rose’s eyes widened at just how intense the gem next to her became. Pink was standing up now, her cheeks glowing a light hue before disappearing. But the hateful scowl on her face didn’t fade so easily. “How can they expect me to take it when they won’t help me!? I was… _screaming_ , but they just watched.” 

She fell back on the log and put her hands on her head, pushing her afro inwards. Then her eyes widened into terrified saucers as she sobbed, “I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I can’t control myself like this!”

The scowl faded into a tearful look of anguish. Rose looked at her with shock, her mouth hanging open slowly. This was not what she was expecting today. Pink Diamond, her war partner, friend, confidant, having a breakdown over a fake vision. Yes, she’s had them too, but it never affected her this much. 

“Please… you don’t need to be sorry about talking about your feelings. I should be sorry for bringing it up.” She put her hand on Pink’s shoulder and squeezed. “But I’m glad you told me about this. You need to calm down, okay? We can stop talking if you want.” 

She gained a pathetic nod in return, and then a desperate hug after that. Putting her arm under Pink’s to return it, she looked up at the sky with exhausted eyes. The only sound that filled her head were the sobs coming from the gem she was hugging. Her thoughts wandered onto different things, like how it barely took a few months… or a year, for this to happen again. Constant relapses seemed to be a new thing she would have to expect. Ever since… she’d rather not say, but ever since then this was happening. 

“Do… you want to go to the temple? I’ll let you in my room if you need to relax.”

Pink pulled back from the hug, her wet eyes turning to the ground. She sniffed and held her head low, hiding her eyes from Rose the best she could. “No… it’s okay. I’m fine now.” She stood up and turned her head away, “You’re… not going to tell the others, r-right?”

“Of course, I haven’t before.” 

Pink turned her head back, a troubled frown on her face. “I’m sorry, I don’t know what came over me. Please, let's not bring this up again.” A desperate look to Rose made the quartz nod.

“Okay, I won’t.” Standing up, she looked off at the yellow sky and plastered a grin on her face. “The sky looks so beautiful when the sun is setting.” 

“Hm… yeah.” 

Pink hummed in response as she looked on too, her eyes dull from depression. Rose’s hands curled up into fists as the smile on her face grew faker. “Let’s find out what the others are doing. I heard Amethyst recently discovered a new power, but I haven’t asked her about it.” 

“Wow… she’s discovering so much, isn’t she?” Pink’s tone grew a little more cheerful, her attitude lightening up. 

Rose turned her head to Pink, her smile changing into a kind grin. “Yes she is.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Rose: "If anyone tries to hurt my baby, I'll poof everyone, then hide what I did."  
> I gave her way too much momma energy in this btw.
> 
> Honestly, felt like this was very OOC for Pink, but I wanted to do it anyway and none of you can stop me. See it as Pink having someone there that she trusts to share her emotions with. 
> 
> Anyway, if any of you have read Just Like You: Crystal Pink AU, I'm almost done with the newest chapter. I've been working on the outline as of late, because I looked over it and didn't like how some of the things went down. But fear not! I've made good progress anyway! Pink and Amethyst are gonna go into emotional WWE, if y'know what I mean. 
> 
> Give a comment on how you feel about the work or my writing, please!


	3. The Price

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pink wasn't talking much nowadays.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welcome to the first pre-war chapter! I wonder what's gonna happen in it?

Pink wasn’t talking much nowadays.

It had been nothing but silence from the small diamond for nearly one hundred years. Ever since she had lost that Pearl of hers, the poor thing. But she was the one who had broken her in the first place. After White had taken her Pearl, both her and Yellow had seen it as her simply being angry and giving them the ‘silent treatment’ as they called it.

Blue did not see it the same way. 

She knew how close both Pink and her Pearl had been. Pink had begged countless times not for her to be taken away after they were caught doing things some would be shattered over. And she gave in time after time. All of it ended with Pink being the one to hurt her Pearl, unable to get a replacement because of her inexcusable behavior. 

Her thoughts had been so distracting, she didn’t notice that she was already near Pink’s room. The large door sat just ahead, closed shut like it had been for months. It made her anxiety grow worse. Just what could Pink be doing in there?

Was she crying, sobbing her heart out? The door and walls had been made to keep out and keep in any noises from the room. It was requested by Yellow and herself after a particularly bad outburst that went on for hours. 

Her hand slowly reached for the door, but stopped halfway and curled in on itself tightly. She shouldn’t impede on Pink's privacy, not when she was feeling so down… yet that same reason was begging for her to go and comfort her. She sighed, getting rid of the weight in her form, before her fingertips made contact with the engraved double doors. It opened.

Pitch black. 

Light from the hall behind her flooded the dark room, her shadow mixing into the darkness of the otherwise deep pink. She looked left and right, her mouth slowly falling open. Was Pink even in here? 

She placed a hand on the wall to her left, and the unspoken command to activate the lights went off. One by one, pink lights illuminated the room. The curtain at the other end was closed shut, and the normal transparent one was gone, replaced by a thicker one. Apparently it was enough to block the light from coming in. 

She would have to get rid of it later, Pink couldn’t stay in such a- 

Her eyes stopped on the floor as soon as she caught sight of a small glint. She tried to determine what it was exactly, bending down so that she could see it better. Then every sense in her form fell silent, disappearing at the sudden rush of shock that drowned her. 

Resting gently on the floor alone, its facets reflecting every light around it, was a pink diamond.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Poor Pink, now you get to question whether she poofed herself or retreated into her gem. 
> 
> Consider this my Valentine's gift for you guys.


End file.
